Monday, January 18, 2010

2009 A Retrospective

So I realized, a little late, that I should probably look back on last year and talk/think about what happened and what I learned, but I'm drawing a blank. I blame the aspartame. I heard once years ago that aspartame which you can find in sugar free gum and diet soda kills your short term memory and ever since then, I've been blaming it for the fact that I can't remember ANYTHING. Like what I wore idea. Aspartame!! So to make it more simple, here are the top ten things I did in 2009 in no particular order:

1) Taking a trip to Disneyland with Mike and getting to meet up with my cousin who I haven't seen in years. Great day with my man, great reconnecting with one of my amazing relatives, AND I got to eat a Disneyland pickle which, if you haven't ever had one, is one of the greatest foods of all time...ever.

2) Visiting Dad & Monica in Virginia and exposing little old nerdrific history lover Mike to Washington DC and Virginia. Watching him stare up at the statue of Jefferson was an unforgettable experience. Oh, so was watching Dad hug Mike in the airport when meeting him for the first time after a red eye flight and no sleep...classic.

3) Loo's Champagne Train birthday party wine tasting champagne limo shenanigans. Here's how it went: finger foods, cheese, champagne, Bean, limo, pictures, champagne, singing, champagne, wine tasting, wine tasting, wine tasting, home, puke, Tough Love, puke, Tough Love, puke, Tough Love, puke, sleep. Worth it!!

4) Graduating college FINALLY. After three colleges, two majors, and 8 years, to finally have my Bachelor's Degree in hand was at times exciting, liberating, and embarrassing.

5) Surviving a soul crushing, emotion bruising, career screwing tax season where two of us ended up in tears, I was yelled at by at least two old women, and I watched my boss fall asleep in his chair and we still didn't get every client's tax return sent in on time...even though we didn't tell them that!

6) Shopping for and buying a house. It was such a jumble of emotions...from wanting to vomit to excitement to regret, to fear, to happiness to really truly feeling like an adult for the first time.

Mike signing the offer on the house. Look how happy he is!

7) Thanksgiving at the Ways. First time in a long time that a holiday was perfectly stress free, enjoyable, tasty, and fun. And it helped that they have the world's cutest butterball baby and rock star little boy.

The Bean helping me make the desserts. Love this kid to pieces.

8) Getting to live with Mike alone for a while in Chico and really see how we are as a couple. The guy drives me nuts, but man are we good together.

9) Moving back to Ridgecrest. I might not be too happy about it right now since I'm STILL unemployed and we are STILL painting our damn house, but getting to re-experience the city I was born and grew up in with Mike turned out to be really great; from going to our favorite hole in the wall restaurants to having one of the most amazing dinners ever at Mon Rev, to spending time with the moms, it has turned out okay...for Ridgecrest...

Mike at our favorite hole in the wall Ridgecrest joint, Golden Ox.

10) New Years Eve / Mike's Birthday / Our 3 Year Anniversary. One of the only trips we've gotten to take out of town with each other alone and by far our best trip yet. We hit all of our faves: art and history, great food, and quality goofy time together. It was romantic, funny, silly, a little bickery of course, just basically a perfect couple of days for Mike and Val.

Cheers! Champagne in the hotel room after the world's best dinner. We're old and boring, but champagne in bed and asleep by 10:30 was perfect for us!

Runners Up: Palm Springs with mom and Loo: relaxing, eating, pooool and Jason and Paul bonus! Painting and bonding with the mo in law. Hanging out with K-Furg and renewing our friendship. Adopting Laci Bailey and loving her in memory of Mike's amazing grandma. Ven visiting and getting to see her after sooo long. Taking care of Loo after she broke her baby ankle. The Green Day concert and spending quality time with the Waysters.

P.S. Seriously, how many of my special moments in 2009 included booze?!!

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Buyer's Remorse

Once upon a time sweet little Mikey and Val went house shopping with their fairy godmother/realtor Joette. They looked at many houses, some old and not so great, some okay, and even one with two kitchens and a toilet in a closet. Then they saw THE house. They walked in and it was....well perfect. They loved that modern color pallet, loved the floors, the appliances, the layout. This was IT. They put in an offer and little Val got tears in her eyes from the excitement and happiness. After a month or so of shenanigans, rigmarole, stress, and silliness, sweet little Mikey and Val were handed their keys. They walk into their new home and for the first time's YELLOW. Like really really yellow. And oh yeah, the previous owners did a piss poor job painting so there is paint EVERYWHERE. And the trim is black. Lots and lots of black. And things don't work and they painted OVER DUCT TAPE and there is a random roll of chicken wire in the shed and they left behind buckets and buckets of paint and and and and....

Buyer's remorse is a thing right?

That being said, sweet little Mikey and crazy pants Val really do love the house. The trim is no longer black and the red wall is no longer pinkish. Things will be fixed and the chicken wire and paint buckets will be on their way to the dump soon. It's on its way to becoming a home. And to anyone that doesn't like the yellow, Mikey and Val don't want to hear about it!!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

A Letter to 17 Year Old Me

Dear Valerie,

I am having a horrible day today and quite a bit of it is your fault. Here are some simple things that you can do to make my life less miserable:

1) Don't slack off your senior year of high school and eff up your grades just because your parents are getting separated.
2) Don't only apply to three colleges, all of which are in California.
3) Don't choose a random major right away. Instead, take GE's for your first year and THINK about what you actually want to do so you can perhaps have a career one day.
4) Don't reject going to a great college because your sister went there.
5) Don't do a long distance relationship with your first boyfriend making you miss any fun you could have had your freshman year in college.
6) Don't transfer schools for a boy who you know deep down you don't really love.
7) Don't get shit-faced drunk at a frat party because you are upset over a break-up that you know was for the best anyway.
8) Don't jump around jobs just because you keep getting offered different ones and you think it's a good thing. It's not. People later on in life will NOT hire you because your resume is so sporadic.
9) Don't stop going to classes because you are depressed and school gives you anxiety. Just suck it up and finish your classes. You are too smart to have F's on your transcripts.
10) Don't fall for mean boys who lie to you. They don't change. Ever.
11) Don't drop out of school 3 classes until graduation after you've already been accepted to grad school so you can move across the country. I don't care if it's a job that you've always wanted. I don't care if you're scared of graduating. I don't care if you've just had a messy breakup. DON'T DO IT.
12) Don't quit that job six months in because you are lonely and a chicken and out of money. You did this to yourself, suck it up and make it work.
13) Don't move for ANOTHER boy, get accepted to a good college, not go and instead go to school online and get a pointless degree.
14) Don't, under any circumstances, move back to Ridgecrest.

Follow these 14 simple hints and you will be a much better and happier person, I guarantee it.



P.S. You suck.