Year in Review 2014

Here is this year's year in review that was sent out with our Christmas cards. I'm pretty dang happy with it, especially since I did it in Publisher and since we don't have that exciting of a life.

(I've edited this version to not have our real last name or real new job locations. Because, well, I curse and say poo on here a lot. Don't need to google my employer and come to this blog, right?)

Happy Birthday Mikey

Happy birthday to my most favorite person in the whole world.

You are such a giant weirdo and thank God for that because no way a normal person that hot would have married me.

Love you!!

At Union Station

The day before Thanksgiving, I was pretty pissy during my commute. There were holiday travelers everywhere, standing on the escalators or stopping mid-walk to stare at some sign, their mouths agape. It was noisy and busy and I was pissy about it. 

So I'm walking through Union Station all in a huff and I hear live music playing which is weird. I walk up to the gate and there is a band of military guys playing country music surrounded by smiling travelers. I stood there for a while watching and found myself smiling uncontrollably along with everyone else. 

Alright Union Station, I'll stop being pissy. You win.

Winter is Here

So there's this gorgeous state forest/park right by where we live now that we like to go hiking in on the weekends. Every time we went, we'd comment that we should bring our camera to take pictures since it's so pretty and the leaves were gorgeous in the Fall.

We finally remembered the other day.

And all the leaves were gone.

But I still think it's super pretty even though it's winter and freezing balls.

Here are some pictures.

(These are all unedited because this computer is new and has no photo editing software on it yet...hence why there are none of my face, duh)

10 Things I Believe

I haven't been blogging because I'm lazy and I kind of forgot I had a blog for a minute there what with work and no computer and obsessing over how fat I look in pants.

You know, the usual.

So I'm going to very belatedly link up with the DC Ladies for their November writing prompts.

Here's the first one...

10 Things I Believe (I took this prompt super seriously of course)

1)  If you wear sunglasses on the metro, you're a douche.

2)  No one is comfortable in skin tight pants, I'm just more sensitive about it than other people. (I have to believe this otherwise my world is crushed)

3)  STAND ON THE RIGHT, WALK ON THE LEFT.

4)  The bigger the company, the stupider the comments on Facebook.

5)  Physique 57 sucks and is awesome at the same time.

6)  Winter is great because there are no longer tons of people outside my metro trying to get me to sign petitions.

7)  Brushing your hair is overrated.

8)  Shopping for clothes is only fun when you're in shape.

9)  Commuting is much better when there's a new Serial episode.

10)  There's a gif for everything.

Life Lately In Photos

I barely blog any more because I'm fussy or because my computer at home is still broken. So here are some photos I've collected on my phone to make up a half assed blog post. Lucky you!

Our first day of our new/shorter commute on the train. Much better!

Mike mustache you to stop harassing him during his morning commute nap

Crazy storms in an office made up almost entirely of windows

Spending our last remaining non-frigid weekends hiking in this gorgeous nearby park

Loving my new Target blanket scarf although I cannot get it to not unroll every 5 seconds

Rainy days call for changing into almost slippers, but also outside appropriate shoes once indoors

Doing my commute alone wasn't so bad when I had a good book and a giant Chop't salad to eat when I got home

Mike stayed in the city with a friend one night, but the pups kept me company just fine (also beer)

The dogs love their new backyard

One weekend, we ventured off to a nearby town and found a super cute wine bar

I look horrible, but happy

I am so cliche, but I am loving the leaves changing here

Relaxing in my obnoxious running tights with a pug on my lap watching Band of Brothers like one should on the weekend

Sitting on my butt watching my husband make me a cocktail (sugar free of course) and my step-mom making me a grilled cheese = happy

Professional pug bugging

The relationship didn't work out with the guy, but the scarf his mom made me is still one of my faves

So excited to have gotten hooked on this...oh man...so good!

Tuffy says, "Seriously with the god damn flash?!"

If Mike and I decide not to have kids, I may just push these babies around in a stroller because I love them so much

Fussy Thoughts

Let's get real.

(Or not, I probably shouldn't publish this.)

The last two years have been really hard.

I was walking through union station to catch my train home yesterday thinking, "Man I feel sad right now. Just fussy, awful sad." And I realized that if someone asked me what was wrong I wouldn't have an answer. It wasn't a bad day at work, nothing exceedingly shitty happened. I'm just sad, worn down, fussy.

Moving is always hard. Moving cross the country is extra hard. Being unemployed is depressing. Getting a new job is nerve wracking. Trying to get pregnant and not succeeding is frustrating. Worrying about money is, well, worrying. Getting lied to by an employer and then laid off unexpectedly is hurtful. Being unemployed again is double depressing and embarrassing. Getting a new job, in a new city is scary. Starting an over 2 hour commute each way is exhausting. Moving to a new city is intimidating. Moving in with a parent is humbling and comes with it's own set of issues. Not knowing what your future holds - what is going to happen with this job when the new computer program rolls out that is going to replace 90% of my tasking, where are we going to live, should we try again to have a baby - is terrifying.

All this and whatever the hell else has happened in the last two years.

I am so aware that so much worse things happen in the world and I try not to put on my poor me hat, but some days I just feel overwhelmed and plain sad.

Is this just how big crazy changes feel or did I royally eff up our lives moving us here?

Why do my jobs always come with so many complications and personal stress? Is it the kind I choose, is it just all jobs are like this, or is it me?

When is it going to stop being hard?

These are the thoughts swirling around my head on a daily basis and it's not fun and I would like them to go away. And sometimes they do, days are good, things makes me happy, I'm lucky in many ways. But you know, I would like them gone for good.

I stopped writing this post on my phone when Mike boarded the train and we talked for a while about all this and other things. He drove us to a local bbq place when we got into town and we skipped our normal healthy dinner and working out for the night; gorging ourselves on delicious bbq and beers. And then, later, he pulled me close while we were cleaning up after dinner, gave me a giant hug, and said something sweet that made all the bad stuff go away for a while.

And in 25 days I get to have sugar again...that will definitely help.